Broken Strings
by hanna is a mushroom
Summary: “So .. this is really it?” -- When ‘So Random’ gets axed, Sonny thinks it’s all over. But things look up when she gets an audition, but there’s a catch. Her love interest is played by none other than Chad Dylan Cooper. So why is she so excited? Sonny/Chad
1. You Can't Feel Anything

Hey! Okay, so this is Sonny/Chad amazingness, coming atcha! Reviews make me happy (: and for it, I might let you steal Sterling from me for a while xD

**SUMMARY** "_So .. this is really it?" _-- When 'So Random' gets axed, Sonny thinks it's all over. But things look up when she gets an audition, but there's a catch. Her love interest is played by none other than Chad Dylan Cooper. So why is she so excited? Sonny/Chad.

---

**Broken Strings**

_You can't feel anything ;_

"So .. this is really it?"

Sonny could feel the lump arising in her throat as she looked upon the empty prop house. She ran a shaky hand through her hair and looked around at the equally distressed faces of Tawni, Nico, Grady and Zora.

"No," she choked out at last, a tear threatening to fall, "it – it can't be!"

"Sonny .." Nico reached over and patted her hand and she looked down at the ground.

"We knew this was coming," he continued.

"Why so fast?" Sonny mumbled into her sleeve.

So Random was over. They'd been officially axed, not enough viewers for the station to carry on producing and shooting the show. Now, the dream was over. Sonny had thought this was _it_. She'd make her big break into Hollywood and never go back to Wisconsin and doing stand-up at her school talent show, eating moldy chocolate mousse at lunch everday. Sure, she'd made mistakes during her career so far – but making it longer would surely just heal those wounds? But, plainly, the company didn't care about her personal feelings. They didn't care that this was breaking her heart, to see the stage lights cut down, the sets put away, the props sold. And what about her mom? She'd been so gung-ho for Sonny to make this her everything. They'd left Wisconsin, took her out of school .. But for what? She let out a sob. At least Nico and Grady and Zora and Tawni had something else. They'd been doing this for _years_, they could get any job they wanted with a single audition. She sighed and relaxed as Nico held her, and felt Tawni's warm hand reach for hers.

"I'm gonna miss you guys," she whispered. "So much."

"Yeah," the rest of them chorused.

So it was really over.

---

"To Mackenzie Falls, and to _me_, Chad Dylan Cooper!"

"Huzzah!" the rest of the cast of Mackenzie Falls chorused just as the So Random cast piled in for their last lunch at the café, before they did their last ever episode of So Random, and said goodbye for the last time. Sonny tried not to let Chad see her red eyes as she walked swiftly through, but she could feel his scrutinizing eyes on her, and it wasn't pleasant.

She tried to keep it together as Brenda slammed some kind of meat on her plastic plate and held in her sob as they sat in silence for the whole lunch time, just contemplating thoughts.

"Guys," she started and they all looked up and she felt herself flush, her eyes moist. "I think .. I mean .. tonight, it's got to be special. Our best show yet."

"Oh, give it _up _Sonny!" Tawni suddenly snapped at her. "It's _over_. So Random's _over_. We're having one last show before they boot us off stage three for good, 'kay? We don't need reminding that the reason we're being axed in the first place is because of _you_."

The whole café was silent, and Sonny felt the tears trickle down again. Abruptly, Tawni got up and ran out of the café angrily, with Nico following her.

"Sonny – " Zora started.

"I just wanna be alone, alright?" Sonny whispered to herself, and Grady and Zora left silently. She didn't care that Chad was watching, that the whole _café_ was watching. She just wanted to cry. Just cry until she had no more tears to cry.

She let herself slump into her arms. This was it. Mackenzie Falls had won. They'd officially beat them. Great.

"Sonny?"

_Chad_, she thought in her head. She didn't want a mocking session. Not now.

"Listen, I'm sorry for what's happened, but, we all saw it coming, right?"

She lifted her head and stared at Chad with the blackest glare she'd ever had. "Shut _up_."

He smirked at her, "Calm, Sonny. The rain's passed. You'll get another job."

"I don't _want _another job!" she snapped at him, rubbing angrily at her eyes, trying to vanquish any tears. "Just, leave me alone, Chad."

He seemed to think about this for a while, before drawing up a chair beside her. "Every show ends sometime."

"But why so soon?"

"It's been two years, Sonny."

"Mackenzie Falls has been running for four years," she remarked, pitiful.

"Well, it's a drama. In drama you get plots. In comedy you get .. sketches, and .. well, everything stops being funny sometime. I guess."

Sonny looked at him, expecting a smirk, or at least a grimace, but he was looking at her earnestly, blue eyes shining.

"I think that's the most selfless thing you've ever said to me," she murmured and a small smile played on his lips.

"I'm not all prep school blazer and no heart, Sonny."

She managed a smile half grimace and he touched her cheek in a sudden moment of spontaneity and she stared at him before he removed his hand, flushed. What he didn't know is that his touch sent electricity down her skin.

"You're a good actress. A great one, Sonny. Things'll pick up, promise," he ducked his head, not used to giving compliments out.

"You've been through this before?"

"Well, uh .." she looked at him defiantly and he sighed. "Sure. Yeah. I have."

At least he lied fluently, and it did make her a tad better, seeing Chad squirm under the spotlight would make anyone feel better. He smiled awkwardly and made to get up.

"Chad, wait."

He looked at her, waiting.

".. Thank you."

"Anytime."

---

Pre-show jitters were normal, but this was different. Sonny was on edge about everything, paranoia overtaking. Even just forgetting one world or coming in at the wrong time was sending shivers own her spine and seeing Tawni was making it worse, even though the blonde has apologised profusely for breaking out on her.

Everyone steered clear of each other, just re-memorizing lines and rehearsing by themselves. Everyone was stiff, they weren't playing it up, their laughs were fake, actions minimal. It wasn't comedy going on, it was torture.

The first sketch went badly.

"Hello there! _Bang_. It's Adam. Adam Collins! _Bam_! You? Me? Us? We gonna do some talking, yeah? Yeah! Yeah? _Bam_!" Nico was practically yelling in Sonny's face, trying so hard not to lose it. But Sonny had lost it already. She simply stared at him blankly, and then out at the audience.

"I – uh .. you .. I mean .."

"Sonny?" Nico whispered to her. But the tears were flooding already and the audience was silent.

"I'm sorry, I just can't .."

The second sketch was too cheesy, too funny to be funny. The rest were stiff, Grady being the only one putting any effort into the sketches, and Sonny was so broken she was breaking into tears at any given moment. The final goodbye was the worst part of the show.

"This being our last show," Grady told the audience, "we're all a little .. uh, emotional. We'd just like to say .. thank you Marshal. For always helping us. To the producers and crew and directors and .. yeah. Just everyone. To my wonderful co-cast members, who are amazing and I love you all. And .. to you guys. Our audience, our fans. You mean a lot to us. Thank you guys. This is our last goodbye."

"Wait!" Sonny found herself saying. "Before .. before we go, I'd just like to say to you all .. thank you. For this opportunity. I've never been on television before and this is just so amazing. Really, really amazing. Thank you."

An eruption of applause, and Sonny could even see a few crying audience members and bowed off down stage. She ran immediately to her dressing room and buried her head in her hands.

Abruptly, her phone rang. "Meet me outside, honey."

She ran into her mother's arms without a second thought. Crying into her chest and taking in the familiar smell was all that needed to calm her down. "I .. I'm just going to miss it so much."

"I know, baby, I know. You're a strong girl. Just pick up the pieces and everything will be fine."

---

"Mackenzie Falls? _Seriously_?"

"I know you have this 'rivalry' with them but – "

"It's not just a rivalry! It's more than that! It's all cut-throat and insane, mom. You don't know. I can't just go against So Random and join the cast of _Mackenzie Falls_!"

"Not Mackenzie Falls, honey. I was just talking about that boy you used to like back home in Wisconsin?"

Sonny reddened. She'd been calling herself _Mrs_. Chad Dylan Cooper back _then_.

"What about him?"

"He's in this new drama and he referred you to audition. Up for it?"

"I .."

"It's hot, honey!"

"Mom," Sonny flushed.

"Seriously! It's a romance between these two kids from different backgrounds, kind of like Romeo and Juliet. But he – Chad – plays this guy called Coby Jackson from a private school, kinda snobby, jackass, that kinda thing. But you'll play Etta Morley, from a public school, just getting by, in love with music, just like you, hon! I really think you could do this, Sonny. I really do. Now, are you up for it?"

Sonny paused. "Sure. Why not?"


	2. In The Ruins Of Us

Thank you so much to everyone who reviewed! It makes me happy, haha. Here's your second instalment. I'm not sure how long this is going to be, but keep reviewing and I'll keep writing? Love you guys.

**SUMMARY 2 **The scene was such a blur. He was shouting, she was shouting and she knew what was coming next. Fiercely, he put his lips to hers, and Sonny lost it.

---

**Broken Strings**

_In the ruins of us ;_

The corridor seemed to stretch on forever. Sonny could feel her palms growing sweaty, her heart started to pound, her head started to ache. Her stomach was a bottomless pit, cascading downwards, filled with nothing but aching emptiness and above, a broken heart. So she wasn't over So Random, but it'd been three weeks after the last goodbye, the episode had aired, and she'd received a ton of fanmail wishing her well. At least that had made her feel better. But she missed it. Missed Tawni's complaints, Nico and Grady's jokes, Zora's just down-right weirdness. She wanted Marshal to tell her how brilliant she was, wanted Chad's jibes. But the thing is; that's why she was here. Because, what she missed the most, was Chad.

He'd always been the enemy. Always, always, always. At least, that was what she'd been telling herself. He was a selfish egotistical jerk and she was supposed to hate him - and sometimes she did - but she couldn't bring herself to let the boy out of her life completely. Truthfully, back in Wisconsin, she'd watched Mackenzie Falls just as avidly as she'd watched So Random. Mackenzie Falls just had that likable quality, the drama, the gossip, the great plots. And, topped off, the cutest guy Sonny'd seen in her, um, _life_? When she'd met him she'd been over the moon, until he'd turned out to be such a bastard. But a lovable one at that.

She smiled to herself at the thought of seeing Chad and inwardly sighed. She was So Random, he was Mackenzie Falls. Goddammit, Romeo and Juliet all over again, huh? But she was sure it was just a phase. He was just a friend, and these weird mucked up feelings she was having for him were just _so _not acceptable. Not now - not ever. Besides, she was always sure there was something up with him and Portlyn, the way she looked at him, anyhow. But Chad was too much of a person to have anyone else in his life. He was his other half, no matter how much that seemed to sting.

"Munroe, Sonny?"

Sonny jumped up and felt the other girls' eyes on her and blushed, before walking towards the door, not helping to notice how many movie stars she spied in the corridor. She entered the door and spotted Chad immediately, and waved. He looked bemused, then waved back, before turning to a girl next to him and smirking. She looked down, hurt, but tried to cover it up and moved towards the director.

"Hey, there, kiddo! How ya doing? Name's Jacqueline. Don't s'pose you've met Chaddy over here, hm?" she grinned and beckoned her towards Chad.

"Actually, I - "

"Hey," he smiled at her. "Name's Chad Dylan Cooper."

"But .. I know that! I know _you_, Chad."

Chad laughed. "Yeah, everyone does, don't they?"

Jacqueline barked out a hefty laugh and patted Chad on the back. "Too famous for his own good, ain't he? Aw, so cute. The both of you!" She grinned then ran off to the producer.

"What's going on with you?" Sonny stared at him, confused and more than hurt.

"I don't know what you're talking about .. Sonny? Sonny .. was it?" he looked at her, clearly acting his pants off.

"Shut up, Chad. You _know _me."

"Do I, Sonny? Do I really?" he murmured to her, blue eyes intensifying. She simply stared at him.

"Whatever. Be a jerk, I don't care," she glared at him, stomach curling. So much for her Shakespearian love story.

It made her more angry than she thought to see Chad ignore her until they were ready to rehearse, watch him flirt with every cast member young enough and stutter out her name, 'trying' to remember. ('I'm terrible at names!')

She'd pouted and let him get on with it, but it stung. His blatant disowning her was getting to her and she tried not to care when another girl kissed him on the cheek. Besides, he didn't even like her.

"Oh, fuck it," she slumped in her chair and sighed.

"'Sup, kiddo? We're getting ready to shoot now, so, uh, if you wanna get into position with Chad over there?" Jacqueline had bounded over without her even realizing and she nodded, just having another look at the words.

Etta was sweet. Shy yet strong on the inside and stubborn, hellishly. But Coby was a jackass, rich, full of himself and the popular ass at his school. Remind you of someone? She scowled as he acted like an anger in front of the crew and the cast, and then spotted her.

"Let's just get this over with, alright?" he mumbled more to himself than to her though his eyes were looking right at her. She ignored him.

"Now, Sonny. Etta's just bumped into Coby for the first time, she doesn't know anything about him. Play her with .. with an open mind. You're kinda thinking, 'he's cute!' kinda thing, y'know? But when he starts being a jerk, the real Texan inside of you jumps out. Etta's very stubborn, right? Am I right? Good. Now. Rolling!"

Sonny attempted to nod as Jacqueline told her the instructions for the scene she was rehearsing with Chad. She tried not to look at him - the audition jitters were enough. It didn't really help that she knew almost every name out there in the corridor, waiting for the same scene. They were all mega-movie stars, all auditioning for the same part. She was just a one in five role on a sketch show. Wow.

"Oh .. kay?" she sighed and ran through the lines in her head one last time, before setting it down and waiting for her cue.

"Annnnd .. action!" Jacqueline slammed her hand down through the hair triumphantly.

Sonny, slash Etta, immediately started walking and 'bumped' into Chad, slash Coby. "Oh, sorry, I wasn't looking .."

"Obviously," he snapped. "You know, it's people as ignorant as you that clutter these filthy streets even more." He made to move off in disgust, but Sonny glared at him.

"_Excuse _me?"

"What?"

"You're being a jerk, and I don't even know who the heck you think you are."

"I'm Coby Jackson, don't you know?" he smirked at her, and flipped on his ray bans. She stared at him, blankly. "Obviously not. You're new right? Obvious, again. Last season Gucci knock-off? Nice, nice."

"Broken sunglasses? Nice, nice," she mimicked and he frowned.

"They're not broken, idiot."

"Oh, really?" She grabbed the 'ray bans' off his head and snapped them in two, spotting out of the corner of her eye, a whole box full of the fake sugar glass sunglasses.

"Cut!"

Sonny stopped gloating after Chad and looked up, heart racing, at Jacqueline.

"Not bad, Munroe! Not bad at all!" she smiled. "Now, let's flip to .. page one-two-six? Start from Coby's line, 'Etta!' Ready? Ready? Good! Action!"

They both nodded, and Sonny inwardly moaned. It was bad enough Chad had started the audition greeting her as if they'd never met, and now he was barely looking at her. Jerk.

"Etta."

"What?" she sniped, hurriedly looking at her script. "Coming to taunt me again?"

"No .. no. I - I was wrong to do that, okay?"

"No, Coby. It's _not _okay. You do this to me so you don't have to introduce me to your friends or your life. You're embarrassed of me because I'm just average and you're .. you're .."

"A rich slob?"

"I was going to say jerk."

"Etta .."

"Just leave me alone!"

He reached for her and she struggled against his grip, the tension intensifying. "Get off of me!" she yelled at him with all her might, letting all of her emotions go.

"Etta! Listen to me! Etta!"

The scene was such a blur. He was shouting, she was shouting and she knew what was coming next.

Fiercely, he put his lips to hers, and Sonny lost it. This wasn't a scene anymore, this was _them_. The anger, the passion, the loss. She could feel his pounding heart, his blue eyes so intense it was like she could never tear her gaze away from him. He was gentle yet the passion was still there, and she bit back a moan as his tongue fought his way into her mouth. She never wanted to stop. But it had to end sometime.

"Coby, I .." she gasped as she pulled away, trying so hard to keep in character.

"I love you too." His blue eyes twinkled and her heart jumped and he was bending again, now, and she was sure he was going to kiss her ..

"Cut!"

Sonny tore her gaze away from Chad for a second and edged herself out of his metal grip.

"What can I say, kids?" Jacqueline was beaming. "Sonny! Call yourself a Morley, you're well on the way. We'll get back to you tomorrow, kiddo."

"Thanks," Sonny blushed, and walked over to get her script, a bottle of water and a kit kat she'd had her eye on since she came in the studio.

"Sonny, hey." She turned to see Chad, scratching the back of his neck awkwardly, with an impish smile on his face.

"You did great out there today," he told her, flushed.

"So you know my name now?" she barked at him, letting the anger out.

"Listen, it's bad enough that you actually turned up for this, now I have to pretend I don't hate you in front of Jacqueline."

Sonny stared at him, taken aback. "What .. what do you mean?"

He frowned. "We're not friends, Sonny. I was doing something to pick you up when you were down. I'm an actor, I was _acting_. I referred you because I felt bad. I didn't think you'd show up."

She felt herself going red and before she could stop herself she whacked his nose with her fist. So the exercise dos with Tawni actually paid off.

But Chad's nose was bleeding. "Oh, shit," she muttered. She was _so _not getting that job now. "Look, Chad, I'm sorry, I just .."

"Just get me so tissues, okay?!" he snapped at her, infuriated.

"There aren't any here, just .. uh, just follow me," she reached for his hand but then thought better of it and tugged his elbow towards the nearest toilet, laughing to anyone who looked at Chad, distraught. She reached the girls' bathroom and went in, pulling Chad in with her.

"What the ..! Why am I in here!?"

"I need tissue!" she sniped, going into the nearest toilet and bringing out a handful. He glared at her and pinched the bridge in his nose to stop the bleeding, hopping up onto the counter.

She started to mop up his face, muttering apologies as she did, and tried to calm herself down and ignore his blue gaze as she mopped. She carefully led a tissue across his mouth and along his jaw, where he'd rubbed his face, and ignored her racing heartbeat at being so close to his lips again. She cleaned up his hands, slowly, enjoying the feeling of his hands in hers and finally gave him a tissue or two for his nose. She sighed.

"I'm so sorry," she mumbled, looking down before throwing the bloodied tissues in the bin.

"You better be. I'm calling my lawyer. That was assault!"

"No, that was me getting you back for being an ass, Chad," she sighed and rubbed at her forehead. He smiled slightly.

"I'm .. sorry. Kind of."

She pouted at him, this all turning into a comfortable joke between them. He poked her shoulder affectionately.

"Okay. I _am _sorry. I'm just .. on edge .. about _this_."

"What?" she mumbled, tearing her gaze away from his face before she got anymore distracted.

"You. I'm not supposed to friends with you, you .. people from Chuckle City, people, people," he told her, raising his eyebrows. "It's all a do from the producers, they think competition makes us better. We have the drive to get on with a target, y'know? But working will fuck that up and I'll get kicked off Mackenzie Falls. But you're alright, Munroe."

Sonny smiled. "Chad Dylan Cooper being nice? Wow. This really is my lucky day."

He rolled his eyes and hopped off the counter, and twisted the door knob, and froze. "Blasted thing won't _budge_."

Sonny frowned. "What do you mean?"

"It's not moving!"

He tried it again and again, twisting this way and that, pulling and shoving. Nothing. "Ah .. crap."

"So .. we're stuck in here?"

"Seems so."

".. Great."


	3. The Truth Hurts

Ahh! Guys, I love you. Ever so much. Honest, truly, I do xD Woo, Chitty Chitty Bang Bang, ftmfw!? Haha. But seriously, thanks, it makes me v. happy to read the responses :] And I know - CDC being nice? Ohmyeffinggod!

EDIT: Sorry for this being so late! School just started, and I suck so hard :[

**SUMMARY 3 **Sonny stopped midway through her sentence as she saw Kaya run off somewhere, and had followed her throughout her peripheral vision, into the arms of ..

"Chad?"

---

**Broken Strings**

_The truth hurts ;_

Sonny took in a deep breath of her surroundings. She could smell old water and something that she really did _not _want to find out about. She could hear the drip of a tap that hadn't stopped, the muffled voices of people rushing by, not even stopping to think of checking where their main star - Chad Dylan Cooper - might be. Speaking of Chad, she could smell _him_. With her eyes closed, all her other senses were heightened immediately. She could smell his cologne, which was like a breath of fresh air - at least, to this stanky toilet, it was. She could hear him breathing, feel it brushing her ear. Warm and constant; it was the only other thing that reminded her that she would actually get out of there.

Chad had started playing tissue football with himself, two fingers miming out hunky football stars, shooting touch-downs and scoring goals, quietly re-enacting the cheers of the crowd and the boos of the opposing team. Sonny couldn't help but stare. This was Chad Dylan Cooper, but not _Chad Dylan Cooper_. This was _the_ real him. The one who didn't care about paparazzi or the fact she'd blab to everyone he liked playing football with his fingers. Still, he looked cute, concentrating so hard.

But, then again. It was probably a lapse of mind. They had been stuck in there half an hour.

Bored, Sonny got up and tried aimlessly at the door handle again, which was pointless anyway. She'd tried her cell - no signal. Shouting? No reply. The handle was jammed, from someway or another, and it wasn't really helping that her claustrophobia was creeping up.

She sat back down, tried to focus on her breathing, even though keeping quiet wasn't really working with Chad in such close perimeters. She closed her eyes. _Go to your happy place, Sonny_. The words sounded comforting, but she couldn't find her centre of peace - not stuck in a tiny bathroom with no way out. She'd always had this fear, this annoying, incessant fear of being closed in. She never took elevators unless absolutely necessary, and didn't take closed in over-head slides - they were completely freaky, especially since she'd always had a picture of getting stuck in one from that episode of _The Simpsons_. She lent her head back, clenched her fists, trying to remember happiness and relaxation. She must have been _too_ quiet then, as Chad's Texan commentator stopped talking about the chilli cheese fries guy who'd got knocked unconscious from a pigskin to the head.

"Sonny?" he sounded worried. She opened her eyes and blinked at him, raising an eyebrow. "You okay?"

"Yeah, uh, just, uh .. fine," she stuttered, sucking in a breath and closing her eyes again. Damn centre. "Just .. don't like small spaces, s'all."

Another deep breath. Chad sighed.

"Claustrophobic? Should've known," he muttered. "All girls are."

She whacked him playfully, frowning even though her eyes were shut. "Shut up, jerk. You must be scared of _something_. Everyone is," she replied, trying to keep her voice calm, though there was an edge of hysteria.

"Not me," he gloated, clearly happy about this fact. "Nothing gives Chad Dylan Cooper any shaky legs."

"Really?"

"Yup."

"Liar."

He chuckled. "Fine. One thing."

"One?"

"Maybe two," he sighed, and she could hear him scratch the back of his neck. "Uh. I'm an aichmophobic."

Sonny opened her eyes and stared at him. "Really?"

"Yeah. Needles and sharp things .. just, ugh. No. Just .." he laughed nervously and Sonny felt a pang of compassion for the boy. "I pass out when I have injections."

Even though it was sad to hear Chad talk about his fear, Sonny felt kind of .. warm. He trusted her. He'd maybe never let the word 'fear' pass his lips before - this was definitely a first. She'd always thought Chad was just .. Chad. A guy. Just a guy. Just that normal guy - okay, maybe not so normal with the screaming fans and the billion dollars he reeled in, but to her, Chad had just been so two-dimensional. He didn't feel. He didn't love or feel comfort or peace. He had friends but didn't _feel _for them. The only emotion Sonny thought he knew was hate. He hated 'Chuckle City' and everybody in it. But now? Now, there was fear. Maybe he wasn't _so_ emotionally stunted. She smiled at him.

"Don't worry, _Chaddy_," - using the pet name Jacquline had - " - next time? I'll be there to catch you," she grinned and nudged him affectionately whilst he smirked.

"Sure, sure."

They slipped into a comfortable silence whilst she absent-mindedly rested her head on his shoulder. It was just them. Not two actors or two rivals. Just Sonny and Chad. All of the rest of the world melted away - nothing else mattered. Just the sound of their breathing, the pulse between them. Sonny could feel his breath on her face, warm and steady, even though hers was faster and more irratic, it was kind of calming just to sit there on the bathroom floor, legs out-stretched, in the arms of Chad Dylan Cooper. Wow. She'd never thought this would happen.

Inside of her, the girlish fangirl screamed. This was Chad Dylan _freaking _Cooper, the one she'd always promised herself to marry as she'd watched Mackenzie Falls in her PJs every Thursday at eight o' clock, hating Portlyn but loving Mackenzie, wishing _she_ could live in The Falls. But there was one thing that separated her and him. He 'acted'. She was just a comedy cop. But now? Sonny was auditioning for a drama. A drama? Sure, she'd been dramatic but this was different. This was tension and emotion and, well, real drama. And her head was spinning with the stupid feelings she felt for the one and only Chad Dylan Cooper.

"What else?" she murmured and the silence was broken.

"Huh?" he frowned, confused.

"You said two things," she responded, rolling her eyes. "That you were scared of?"

"Oh, yeah. Uh, rollercoasters," he laughed, sounding stupid already. "It's kind of goofy."

"Aw, no. It's cute," she blushed as soon as she said it and he coughed, embarrassed. "You shouldn't be so .. locked up. Letting things out is the part of trusting each other, you know."

"I _know _that, stupid. Just .. never met anyone I can trust that much."

"You told me," she poked him.

"Well, I was having a mental lapse."

Sonny giggled. "You trust me, I get it. 'Cos we're friends now, right?"

"Yeah," he replied immediately, as if there was no time to waste. "I guess we are."

She smiled.

---

They spent three hours cooped up in a bathroom, before Jacqueline found them, Sonny sleeping, Chad just absently twiddling with her hair, even though he said nothing about it afterwards. It had awkward and sweet and he had fallen over as he got up in an attempt to 'not wake her', and he kept blushing and acting like a goof. He'd even let her hug him goodbye, which Sonny had secretly revelled in. But the big news?

"_I got it_!" Sonny screamed at her Connie, bouncing up and down on her heels and grinning madly, heart pounding and she _still _didn't really believe she would be spending years on set with Chad.

"Oh my god! _Sonny_!"

Connie was acting just as stupid and goofy as Sonny was and her daughter laughed. They embraced, Sonny breathing in the familiar smell of her mom after five hours out.

"But, hon, you were supposed to be back .. what, three hours ago! What happened?"

She blushed, "Well, uh, I got stuck in the bathroom." Connie opened her mouth as if to speak, but Sonny was already bounding over to her room, script of '_Falling'_ - the classy name for the drama - in her hand, head full of girlish thoughts and stupid crushes on Chad. Jacqueline had hired her on the dot - 'because she and Chad had so much _chemistry_'. She'd never noticed _that_ before. Nico had always teased her about fancying the Mackenzie Falls star, but he'd never been serious. Ever since she'd joined 'The Falls' after the lame Superhero incident, Nico'd always kept that jibe up. But, truthfully? Sonny had dropped all that, 'OMG, CDC!' stuff as soon as she joined the cast of So Random and found out about the stupid rivalry between them and Mackenzie Falls, and since her beloved Peace Picnic did no good, she had been utterly heartbroken. If she'd remained a fan, Chad would've loved her. He loved his fans and his popularity because that was just the kind of guy he was. But still - Sonny loved her fans. But she didn't value them over the people she was really friends with. And now .. now, _Chad _was her friend, not that she ever mentioned him in her AIM chats to her So Random cast mates, who were now either shooting movies or starting up a random music career - hello, Tawni! - whilst Zora was actually going to _school _- something that Sonny could _never _imagine her at. She smiled to herself as she read through the first page of the script, though her thoughts were elsewhere.

Chad had been really, really .. _nice_. But 'nice' didn't really fit his description. Chad was known as 'that guy'. He was cute - to look at. Get to know him? Jerk. _Actually _get to know him? Still a jerk, but an adorable one at that. Finger football? That definitely made Sonny's 'most awesome' list. But it wasn't him. He shouldn't put on a such a show, be nice to the press, to the fans, to the cast. At least - of _his _show. To the So Random cast he'd been a big jerk, and Sonny had hated him. She'd been so disappointed that her favourite actor in the whole _world _turned out to be such a class-one a-hole, and it had hurt. But the whole crush thing never went away. She was fascinated by him, and all the while _told _herself she hated him. He was Chad - a jerk and the _enemy_. But still incredibly, incredibly cute.

..Not that that mattered.

As she flipped through the script of the first episode, she sighed happily. She was certain Etta and Coby were totally going to be amazing together .. as were she and Chad, even if he only saw their relationship as, well, friends. But being friends with Chad Dylan Cooper was better than nothing at all - at least, to Sonny it was - so she'd take it any day. It was kind of stupid - her feelings for him. They were unnecessary, but she couldn't push them away. As much as she wanted him to leave her alone and ignore her, she was the one running after him, after all. She needed him in her life. He was like her other half .. even if he didn't know it. Yin and yan - happy and sad, optimistic, and, uh, not. He completed her, in a sense. But he was just getting over the hurdle of friendship, and, besides, she knew he'd never be interested in someone from Chuckle City anyway.

She snapped the script shut.

---

"Alright, kiddies!" Jacqueline bounded over to them, with as much playfulness as a child. "How are you today? Good? Good! _Bam_. Alright. We're starting from episode one .. uhhh, scene _eight_. Sonny-bom-bonny? You're up!"

Sonny nodded quickly, taking in a big breath. Two weeks after receiving the news after the whole locked-in thing, and it was still daunting. She hadn't seen Chad yet. Yet. And it was killing her. But she tried not to picture it. His face, his cologne, his laugh. They all vanished. At least, she hoped.

She was standing opposite from Kaya, an English girl, who was her best-friend at the school, and slowly in real life. She was gorgeous, that no lie. She had big brown eyes and shortish brown hair, with a freckled face and an ultra-thin body. At the moment, they were both clad in uniform, Sonny's guitar in her hand and rucksack on her back. She was supposed to be oh-so-_different_. She didn't fit in with the bitches with Louis Vuitton hand-bags and kitten heels, she didn't fit in with anyone. Just her best friend, Shawn - slash Kaya - and eventually Coby. Eventually. The love story that bloomed between Etta and Coby was amazing to her. She was totally in love with Coby on paper. He was sweet once Etta got to know him. But that was just her fangirl talking again.

"Sweetie? Ready to go?"

"Yeah, yeah, I just - " Sonny stopped midway through her sentence as she saw Kaya run off somewhere, and had followed her throughout her peripheral vision, into the arms of ..

"Chad?"

But he couldn't hear her. His arms were wrapped around her and his head bending down to meets hers and -

Sonny looked away.

Something stirred in her. Her insides flamed, her head pounded, her vision blurred. She felt nauseous and angry and hysterical all at the same time as she tried _not _to watch Kaya make out with _him_.

She'd really thought it might happen. But that was just her stupid, _stupid _imagination. He was just that jerk. He was just her friend. He didn't feel about her the way she did about him. She felt herself flush - she'd been so _stupid_! Her body started to shake with the anger and the embarrassment of thinking things wrong. She looked up and saw Chad's perfect face and perfect _everything_, including freaking _girlfriend _Kaya, and the blood drained out of her face. This wasn't a fairytale. This was just her, Sonny, an actress and him. A god, compared to her. And his perfect girlfriend and his perfect life.

She tried not to show the tears as she sprinted for the bathroom.


	4. You Broke Me

So I officially suck. Real hard. I'm so sorry for leaving this so long! I completely forgot what with me being ill and school and all that bleh stuff. But I promise to update regularly on this now. Btw, have we come up with a good shipping name yet? Channy sounds like an STD.

Thank you to everyone who reviewed – I heart you guys. Fo' realsies.

**SUMMARY**Without saying a word, he grabbed her, pulled her to him and kissed her. His tongue entered her mouth, his hands pushed her to his body, radiating warmth. She kissed him back, hands intertwining in his hair, moaning softly. This wasn't Coby and Etta.

This was Sonny and Chad.

**---**

**Broken Strings**

_You broke me ;_

The tears were blurring her vision, and she stumbled many times as she sprinted the way along to the girl's bathroom, trying not to remember the sight of Chad's lips on Kaya's, comparing that to how it felt to kiss _her_ in that practice scene. But it didn't work. Even curling up in a ball on bathroom floor reminded her of how they'd gotten locked in there only two weeks ago, how he'd held her and they'd just been _them_.

Fucking Kaya.

She was so _perfect_. Tall, skinny, gorgeous. She was everything Sonny thought she wasn't, everything Chad wanted. She'd really thought they had .. clicked. He was Chad when he was with her, just Chad. Not _Chad Dylan Cooper._ Not the egotistical jerk who never looked at you twice. She thought she'd made an impression, improved him, rubbed off on him, a little. Made him think twice, do a good deed. Whatever. But that little piece of her conscience that had always warned off her feelings for him was gloating now. She let her brow crease as a new set of tears flooded down her cheeks. She hated her. She hated _him._ Even his name was painful to think of. He had to choose her. Had to choose perfect Kaya, not just your everyday average Sonny Munroe.

She hid her face in her orange sweater, using the thick sleeves to rub away her tears and mop up most of the moisture. She barely noticed when the door opened and clicking high heels came towards her.

"Sonny?"

Sonny winced as the golden voice like wind-chimes stung her. _Kaya_. Even her English accent made her better.

Meekly, she looked up, feeling her cheeks burn a deep tomato red as she realized how ridiculous that must've looked.

"Sonny, come on," she held out of her hand, and glumly, Sonny took it.

Kaya took a breath. "What's wrong?" her voice sounded so .. _innocent._ Damn her. Why did she have to be so nice? Sonny really needed a reason to hate her other than her boyfriend choice.

"Nothing, nothing," Sonny mumbled, looking down, feeling like an idiot in front of someone so beautiful. "I just got something in my eye."

Kaya dropped her hand, a smirk replacing her compassionate smile, her eyes losing their dewy softness, growing hard. "Yeah, like anyone'll believe that. I don't. And _Chad_ doesn't either, Sonny. He doesn't like you, if this is what this whole shitbag's about, so stop crying over someone you're never gonna get, and get back to the set so we can shoot this crap already, 'kay?"

Sonny stared at her, taken aback. She opened her mouth to speak but was interrupted –

"Good," she let out a harsh, barked laugh, and made a mocking sad face at Sonny's tear streaked face, she gently let a finger slide down a tear-mark on her cheek then pulled at the skin, pinching so hard it hurt and left a large red mark on her cheek. Sonny recoiled from her, anger exploding from her now.

"What is _wrong_ with you!?" Sonny yelled at her, her cheek smarting.

"Nothing, babe. I'm good. You're not. I want you off my set," Kaya was glaring at her now, and Sonny's heart pounded. She had no idea what lengths this girl would go to, to get what she wanted.

"This isn't about Chad," Sonny said slowly.

Kaya's eyes lit up. "So you do like him? Cute. I'm texting Sharona as we speak."

And with that, she left the bathroom, leaving a shocked and angered Sonny behind.

---

"Sonny-bom-bonny!" Jacqueline screeched from across the set, making a lot of people in the hundred-metre distance between them wince. "Girl, my baby! What's wrong?"

"Oh, nothing, Jacqueline," Sonny tried to smile with all her might, but only managed a poor grimace. "I just needed a breather. Overwhelmed, s'all."

Jacqueline narrowed her eyes, and flicked subconsciously at Chad. "Sonny, you can tell me anything. I'm the mom on this set, Sonny-bonny."

Sonny managed a nod and walked weakly back on set, avoiding Kaya's piercing gaze, trying to block out her bell-like pealing laugh as she giggled stupidly at Chad's joke. She still couldn't believe her. So, what. She wanted publicity? She wanted her show? She wanted to be Etta? Sonny was never going to let that happen. However, she eyed Kaya nervously. She could pull off anything with her perfect acting skills and perfect everything else. She let out a breath she didn't realize she'd been holding.

She hated and envied the way she draped herself over Chad, how he always looked at her as if she was some sort of goddess. She wanted those sparkling blue eyes to look at _her_ that way, not at freaking Kaya. Her stomach grumbled involuntarily, and she realized she hadn't yet eaten, and made her way past the set again, and towards the cafeteria, which was out of stage four and about three hundred metres down, ignoring Kaya and Chad once again.

"Sonny! Hey! Wait up!"

She didn't wait, even though she was dying to talk to Chad. There was ultimate ecstasy at the sound of his voice, yet replaced by the fire of anger at herself for being so .. stupid.

"Wanna grab a bagel?" he was right next to her already, grinning goofishly.

"I don't eat bagels," Sonny spat out immediately, venom lacing her words, before pausing and realizing how ridiculous that sounded. Chad frowned.

"O .. kay?" he shrugged it off, then walked in silence with her.

"I mean .. what I meant was .." she trailed off, floundering for a good sentence in her head. She stopped walking. "Why didn't you tell me about Kaya?"

He was confused for a moment, before he regained composure. "We met a week ago, at her audition for Shawn. She's brilliant, isn't she?"

He smiled back towards the stage, even though she was already out of sight.

"Um, yeah."

"You don't like her." His voice was dead-pan. Disappointed?

"No, I do," she let the same dead emotion trail into her voice, and sighed. "I'm just .."

He looked at her, expectantly. "What?"

".. Happy," she said at last. "For you guys. You look good together."

She started walking again, faster this time, her face crumbling. _Compose yourself, Sonny_. It didn't exactly help that her heart was beating erratically.

What she really wanted to say was: "Your girlfriend's a big bitch, she just wants the show. Not you. Not like _I _need you Chad."

But held her tongue, though the words were weighing down her tongue and she felt nauseous.

"What happened earlier?" he asked absently. He didn't really want to know, he was just making small-talk. Sonny inwardly kicked herself for knowing so much about her. So? She was observant!

"Got something in my eye."

".. Right."

Darn Kaya for predicting that. She scowled at the ground.

"Listen, I was wondering .."

"Yeah?"

"Why don't you come back to my place sometime this week?"

She felt her heart flutter, and the words, "What about Kaya?" were almost out of her mouth before he said –

"We could rehearse our lines, since Jack's really into the whole 'learning at home' thing. She treats filming like home-schooling," he laughed quietly. Sonny shrugged.

"Uh, sure. Will Kaya come?" she tried to sound hopeful, but the anger that laced her words diminished that.

"She can if you want her to - "

"I don't."

Chad half-smiled, not even caring she was bashing his girlfriend. "I just thought just you and me would be better, since we have a lot of lines."

_And kissing scenes,_ Sonny added in her mind, smiling at the thought.

"Sure, when?"

"Well, I can do tonight, so –"

"Sounds awesome."

---

She had spent half an hour in the bathroom already. She looked herself over. She was wearing knee-high American Apparel socks, an huge purple hoodie and a cute blue thigh-length dress, along with slip-on vans. Simple. Classic. Sonny.

But she'd tried on hundreds of different outfits before that, so this outfit didn't feel any better than the first one she had. Her make-up was simple. Eye-liner, mascara, a tiny bit of blusher and the hint of lip-gloss. She looked ..

"Gorgeous!" Connie grinned from around the bathroom door, and Sonny blushed.

"Thanks, Mom," Sonny sighed, twiddling her hair absently. "Don't worry about picking me up, by the way. I'll just get the bus back."

"Don't be silly, Sonny. I'll swing by," she smiled and Sonny cringed. She really didn't want Chad to meet her mom.

"Really, mom .. don't," she offered a smile, but it was covered by worry. She didn't want Chad thinking any less of her than he did already. They were just on the good friends level.

Connie rolled her eyes. "I know you're trying to impress this boy – Charles? Was it? – Sonny, but .. you know .. he'll like you for who you are. And that's a mother's girl from Wisconsin, baby."

Sonny smiled half-heartedly, and hugged her mom, before catching sight of the time. "Oh, crap! I'm late. I'll get the bus, mom. Really. Love you!"

---

Sonny knocked anxiously on room 1034 in one of the priciest hotels around Hollywood, and waited nervously. She immediately felt overdressed, and her cheeks heated up. The door opened, revealing Chad clad in a casual suit jacket, skinny jeans and bright orange socks. He grinned.

"Didn't think you'd turn up," he smiled, letting her in.

She heard the faint tinkling of piano in the background of the apartment, and lost concentration for a moment. "Yeah, my mom was being - .. hang on, is this Debussy?"

Chad rubbed the back of his neck. Another thing he did when he was feeling silly. She smiled affectionately at him, but had rubbed it off her face by the time he looked up.

"Yeah, it is," he grinned awkwardly.

"Claire de Lune," she mumbled, feeling stupid herself. She paused. "I thought you'd be into like .. different stuff."

He chuckled. "I was a tortured child."

Chad shut the door, still slightly flushed, before he regained composure, reached for a remote and pressed a button. The music faded into something that sounded like Paramore, but she wasn't quite sure.

"So, rehearsing?" her voice made it sound like the exact opposite of that was on her mind. He half-smiled.

"Yeah, one sec," he turned down the lights and Sonny felt her heart beat faster.

"What's with .. the-the lights?" she stammered, blushing.

"The scene we're doing is during night-time," he shrugged, as if it was no big deal. "I thought I'd make it more realistic."

"Mm-hmm," her voice was shaky. She knew which scene he was talking about.

It was the most pivotal scene in the one of the last episodes of the series. They'd done it before, in a slightly diluted pre-watershed version. The real version was much more .. _hard_. It forced her to cry on time, to pledge her love for him, to kiss him and then hate him .. and it even confused her just reading it. She already knew the words off by heart, by any matter. It was her favourite scene of the whole freakin' series.

She closed her eyes, and became Etta.

He walked forward tentatively, hands in his pockets. "Etta?" She stayed still, gazing out of the window, across the darkened sky. "Etta, c'mon. Talk to me."

He reached for her hand and the feel of his skin on hers sent electricity down her spine. "Etta, please," his lips were right next to her cheek, his breath warm on her face. "Fuck it," he muttered, angry now, and stepped back. "Etta, dammit! Talk to me!" Desperation was in his voice, but now it was her turn to be angry.

"What!?" she yelled at him, eyes flaming. "Coming to taunt me again, Coby? Hm? Poke the poor girl, is that what you guys do at your fucked up school?"

"No, Etta .. I-I was wrong to do that, okay? I'm sorry," he pleaded with her, eyes locked on hers. But she wasn't buying it.

"No, Coby! It's not _okay_. You push me around and do all this crap to me so you don't have to introduce me to your friends or your life. You're embarrassed of me because I'm just some lame average poor girl, and you're .. you're .. "

"A rich slob?"

"I was going to say jerk," she spat at him, eyes narrowed.

"Etta, come on, don't do this .." he mumbled as she started to walk away. He put his arm around her waist and pulled her to him, other arm pushing against the small of her back, literally pinning her to him.

"Leave me alone, Coby!" she struggled with all her might, their gaze intensifying. "Get off of me!" she started to pound her fists against his chests, the tears she'd been holding in flowing freely from her face. "It's your fault for fucking Shawn, you jerk," she whispered.

Oh, shit. That wasn't part of the script. He stared at her, but didn't break the scene. "What do you mean my fault, Etta? She came onto me! It was a mistake, I promise you, a mistake. I'd much rather be with you, any day."

Sonny stared back at him, wondering if his words were true, before the trance was broken and she pulled away from him, resuming scene.

"Etta, come back!" but she was running. Away from him, out of his apartment, down the corridor and into the elevator. She swallowed. Hard. This was much more than the scene now. She doors were shutting just as he slipped through, panting.

Without saying a word, he grabbed her, pulled her to him and kissed her. His tongue entered her mouth, his hands pushed her to his body, radiating warmth. She kissed him back, hands intertwining in his hair, moaning softly. This wasn't Coby and Etta.

This was Sonny and Chad.

The doors opened and an impatient man tittered at them, and she broke apart from him. She stared up at Chad's twinkling blue eyes for a moment, before sprinting out of the elevator, tears leaking again, chest heaving, out into the cold air of evening outside of the hotel.

"Shit," Sonny whispered to herself, swallowing her nerves. She started to pace, hoping that Chad was still in the elevator, and not coming to find her. She felt so airy. Like it wasn't real. She pinched herself. Too hard. She felt sick and dizzy, and stumbled out off the sidewalk, looking around for the bus stop. It all happened too fast.

"Sonny!" Chad shouted after her, finally coming out of the hotel.

She whipped around and looked at him, but his expression was horrified. All she heard was the blare of horns before she was knocked to the ground.


	5. For The Last Time

**Broken Strings**

Mini chapter:

_For the last time ;_

"_We are gathered here today, to remember the passing of the youthful and bright Sonny Munroe. A girl so full of life and passion for her work. Just sixteen years old. Only sixteen."_

_The priest turned his dark brown eyes to stare at him. "And it's his fault."_

---

Chad Dylan Cooper awoke with a start, heart pounding in his chest, head aching, sweating profusely. His eyes flicked open and the subtle beeping of the monitor just to the left of him reminded him that she was still there. But it didn't make the nightmares he'd been having any better.

He looked upon the paler, thinner, bruised face of Sonny Munroe, complete with a thick bandage on her head, cast on her leg and on her arm. When the car had hit her she'd broken her leg and arm, and had severe concussion. She still hadn't woken up. Was this it? This her kind of Life on Mars, hit by a car, coma thing. He didn't even know if it was a coma, but she had barely fluttered an eyelid since he'd ran over to her, called 911 and taken her to the ER. He'd sat with her ever since, just sitting by her. People had flocked, paparazzi had stalked. Her mom was the only one who spent more time than he did – the hospital made him go home at night-time on the weekends, but she was allowed to stay. Anxiously, he lifted his gaze to Connie Munroe's, who was standing outside of Sonny's private room, glaring at him.

He inwardly sighed. It hadn't been his fault! Had it? But the guilt still weighed him down. If he hadn't called after her, she wouldn't have turned around, she wouldn't have lost concentration, she would have continued walking to the other sidewalk, unscathed. But no. He had to have yelled, to have distracted her. Seeing that car knock her over –

A lump arose in his throat, his stomach churned. He glanced back at the monitor, the constant beeping calming him down. She'd be fine. He knew she would. She was a strong girl, she'd pull through. She would.

Wouldn't she?

He reached forward and took her hand, wondering if she could feel it. He knew when you were knocked unconscious you could still hear everything around you happening, you just couldn't see or get up. But what about _this_? This .. coma, or whatever it was. Maybe she was just sleeping. Really, really deeply. He sighed.

Things had gone too far that night, which had only been four days ago. Rehearsing that scene with her had been a mistake. Inviting her over had been a mistake. She was just that girl from Chuckle City who he kind of liked.

So that was a lie.

But she wasn't for him. She wasn't the piece of puzzle that was meant for him. They weren't supposed to be together, they were too different. It was forbidden. Chad Dylan Cooper going out with Sonny Munroe was too .. wrong. She was from So Random, he was from Mackenzie Falls. It separated them too much. She wasn't meant for him. So why did he feel this way? These stupid, irrelevant feelings that made him see Sonny's face whenever he kissed Kaya. He was convincing himself that the hole in heart was Kaya shaped, not Sonny shaped. But a puzzle piece only has one correct fit, and he was leaning more towards Munroe.

And he didn't even _like _Kaya. She was too needy, too grabby. Too, "Chad! Chad!" all the time. He knew Sonny wouldn't be like that. So Kaya was just a distraction. She was pretty, sure. Although nothing compared to Sonny.

He'd always been intrigued by her. By her difference from the rest of the So Random members, her optimism. Sometimes she annoyed him, but most of the time it was just .. interesting. To watch her. To move about the space. Watch how she moved from person to person, fan to fan, shaking hands, signing autographs without getting bored. How she put other people's feelings before her own, how she even put up with _Tawni_. She was so .. amazing. Unique. So he'd always liked her. But he was Chad. He wasn't allowed to show any feelings apart from when he was acting. Apart from that, it was the cold, metal slate for everyone. But for some reason she could walk through that slate. Sometimes he slipped up. Like when they were playing musical chairs. A lapse of mind, he helped her up, she _tripped _him up. When she was having trouble with her first fan, he helped her. As cool as that beard had been, they both knew why he had done it. Because he _did_ care, believe it or not. And it surprised even him to think about it. He wasn't supposed to care. It wasn't what he did. It was what Sonny did. So she was rubbing off on him a little.

But even with coming to terms with his feelings for her .. it was still weird. And seeing her so down after So Random was cancelled .. it made him feel bad. So inviting her had been another lapse. Of course he knew she would get the part, she was an amazing actress, but he'd never say it to her face. And when they'd rehearsed the diluted confrontation scene and they'd kissed – it had been so .. _real_. He'd wanted her so badly, he'd never wanted to end it. But of course it had to end sometime, and he'd had to be the person to do it. Even though it stung, pulling away. And then at his hotel room .. he'd lost it. She knew him. She understood him. Claire de Lune – okay, so he'd put that on to impress her, he'd always known she liked Twilight, so he'd bought the soundtrack after filming. So he could be considerate. And nice. And affectionate. But it still didn't make whatever he felt for her right.

He dropped her hand, and immediately regretted the feeling of it in his.

---

It was some two hours later, when he'd drifted back into uneasy sleep, that Tawni burst into the room, screeching her head off, with Nico, Grady and Zora not far behind. He jumped up, alarmed.

"Ugh, what are _you_ doing here!?" she moaned loudly, and he glared at her.

"Why are you shouting?" he snapped at her in a harsh whisper, automatically looking to Sonny to see if she'd changed at all.

Tawni rolled her eyes, taking the bouquet of red, pink and white roses from Nico and putting them on the table by Sonny's bed which was already covered with presents, cards and other flowers from fans, family and friends. Zora stared at him gingerly, as did the rest of the cast once they'd stopped faffing over flowers.

"I .. I should go," he muttered, though his voice was precautious. He didn't like leaving her side. Zora sensed this, and her lip puckered.

"No, stay," she said, and four pairs of shocked eyes turned towards her. Chad raised an eyebrow, but sat back down.

"Zora!" Tawni hissed.

The small girl ignored her, and went over and stared at Sonny. "I miss her."

"Yeah," Nico agreed sullenly. "It's not the same on set without you guys," he touched Tawni's and Grady's arms, smiled at Zora. "Or without her."

They all stared at her again. Chad felt so intruding even just listening, and tried to focus on the beeping again. He sighed.

"You know she really loves you guys," he mumbled. "Even on set now .. she's still miserable."

It was true. He'd often found her sitting in her trailer, sniffling. He'd never comforted her though, and the pang of stupidity washed through him.

They were silent for a moment, before Tawni sighed. "Well .. I guess I better head back to the studio .." she trilled, though her voice didn't sound perky and Tawni-like.

"Yeah, uh, yeah." Nico shuffled awkwardly, and Zora nodded. Grady just seemed in agreement anyway, and the three of them sidled out.

Tawni was still standing there, however, staring at Sonny's figure. "I can't believe .."

Her voice broke, and tears rolled over her cheeks, though she moved so that Chad couldn't see. Instinctively, he got up and put an arm around her, though the position was awkward, she rested her head against his chest and wrapped her arms around his waist.

They'd barely shared a conversation with each other.

"I'm sorry," she sniffed. "It's just such a big toll on us. On you."

She sighed, pulled away. "I guess I should go. It was good to see you, Chad," her voice was gentler, less Tawni-like, more .. natural. She cast a glance over at Sonny, then handed him a piece of paper with numbers scrawled on it. "Text me updates?"

He nodded, slightly bemused at her sudden niceness, and she left. Chad sat back down unsteadily, retaking Sonny's hand.

"Come on, Sonny. Wake up."

- - -

Aw. This was kinda hard to write, since it's _Chad_ and all, and I know it doesn't really have a point to it, I just thought it'd be good to have a look into Chad's point of view for a chapter. Next chapter is basically the same, Sonny style. So yeah. Keep reviewing, reading, whatever (: Love you guys!


	6. Let Me Hold You

So, I suck. Uberly. Majorly. I'm so, so, _so_ sorry to keep you guys waiting for fuhreakin' ever, and I promise to repay you with a brand new story and more regular updates this summer (:

I have to give credit where credit is due, and that is to **Blue Scrubs** for giving me an idea for this chapter, which starts off Sonny, before you guys get confused, then switches. And thanks **all of you**, for reviewing and reading and wanting me to continue. It really helps, and I love you all (L)

Sorry for the change in perspective. I've been writing in third person for the other chapters, but I recently started practicing second person for an English story for school, so it's sort of stuck. If you like this, please say! If you think it's horrible, also say. I'm not really sure which way I prefer yet (:

**Broken Strings**

_Let me hold you ;_

_The light is so bright and you blink rapidly, trying to get away from it, to run away from it. What is it they say? Don't go into the light? Oh, fuck, Sonny, what have you gotten yourself into _this_ time? You try to move but invisible chains are pulling you down. You can hear horns – cars? – worried voices, screaming, shouting. Your body feels oddly warm. Too hot. Far, far too hot. Your arm starts to scream out in pain. Shit! What is that? You try to move your head to look but you feel paralysed. Then your leg is burning too and you thrash in pain, your mouth opening but no sound coming out. You feel pressure on your hand, but it's soft and comforting this time. You hear a voice, "Sonny? Sonny? Stay with me, please. Sonny? Can you hear me?" You try to respond but you can't speak. You can't do anything. All you can concentrate on is the pain._

---

It's been two weeks. Two weeks, four days, seven hours, twelve minutes and thirty-two seconds.

And she still hasn't woken up.

You rest your head against the soft material of the mattress, immersing yourself in her smell as she rests so close. You want to reach out and touch her, kiss her, tell her to wake up. You want so many things. Too many things. But they're all impossible.

_Wake up. Wake up. Wake up. Please, Sonny. Wake up._

It's your mantra. It's the only thing you can think, the only thing you can say. She's constantly there by you, a reminder that it's your fault. You made this happen. If only you hadn't called her, if only she hadn't turned, if only that truck hadn't been speeding –

You shudder at the memory, seeing her body so crumpled. She'd looked so confused, so lost. All you had done was sit there and hold her hand. You called 911, you sat there in the ambulance whilst they worked on her. You stood outside the OR whilst they fixed her. You kissed her forehead when you thought she was waking up that one time three days ago. She fluttered her eyelids – the most subtle, small thing. But it'd been a sign, at least.

You just want her back.

"How is she?" you look up to see Connie, Sonny's mother walk in, her frail hands shaky as she clutches at her handbag. You pause, your breath catching in your throat. You know how much this woman despises you.

"She's .. good."

"Good?" she scoffs, a harsh, bitter laugh. "She hasn't been good since she fell into this stupid coma." She bites back tears. You wince.

"It's not my fault," you mumble.

She seems to soften. "I know. But …"

You settle into an uncomfortable silence. You can't blame her. You're the boy who took her daughter away. It _is_ your fault. You know it. She knows it. The whole world knows it.

The paparazzi haven't left you alone. You spend most nights here, but it doesn't stop them from getting a glimpse when you leave the hospital on the rare occasions. They ask questions like: 'Did you push her?' and 'How does it feel to know she might not wake up?' It pushes a hole through your chest every time. She will wake up. You know that. She has to. Because what will you do without her?

You reach numbly for her hand and squeeze it into yours.

_Wake up. Please._

Your phone shudders silently in your hand. "Hello?" you whisper.

"Chad?"

"_Tawni_?"

"I think you should see this."

---

"_HE DOESN'T LOVE ME ANYMORE_" headlines were plastered all over the magazines and newspapers, a picture of a 'distraught' Kaya crying, her mascara down her cheeks, hair messed up pictured on every one of them. You groan inwardly. You'd almost forgotten about her. Tawni is standing awkwardly by you, flipping through pages.

"She's really using Sonny as a publicity stunt?" you mutter through gritted teeth as you read the article. It claims that you've left her for Sonny, that you're some sort of 'player', and that it's your fault that Kaya's career is now ruined, as 'Falling' will maybe not air until next year. It seems the magazine has gone far past against even you, it's now on this made up third side, 'Kaya's side'. Team Sonny, Team Chad or Team Kaya. You swallow back the bile in disgust as you realize how the rest of the world just sees this as a game.

"Bitch," Tawni mumbles, in agreement. You slam the magazine shut and ignore the blasts from cameras outside. "Wait – Chad? What are you doing?"

You start to walk towards the doors and fling them open.

"If you want to get your facts straight," you begin, snarling at all of them, nostrils flaring, "Kaya is a fucking slut and a crap actress who'll never get another job and she only got this one because she slept with the casting director. 'Kay?"

The roars from outside grew louder and Tawni drags you back in, much against your will.

"Never – do – that – again!" she yells at you. You ignore her and storm back into Sonny's room.

"I'm so sorry."

---

_The light is getting darker now. The screams stopped a while ago, you knew that. You felt being moved, you felt the pressure on your hand being torn away, and you immediately missed it. You can only hear the constant beeping. You don't mind it inside your little calm world. You have Chad with you, wherever you are. Tawni, Nico, Grady and Zora. Your mom. They're all there. But they're too pale, too ghostly to be real. They look at you horrified when they think you're not looking, and it scares you to death, but then how are you sure you're not dead? It's weird. You can feel something getting stronger, something getting louder. It takes a while for you to realize it's your heartbeat. It seems to loud, and it pounds in your ears. You look at your mother, bemused, but she's gone. It's just black now. You're drowned by the blackness, the light's gone. You open your moth to scream and –_

"Sonny? Sonny? Can you hear me?"

You blink and stare up into the face of a wrinkled man. Light slowly fades back in and colour seeps back into your vision. You sob in relief and another pair of hands grab you, and you relax into your mother. You don't know what's happened. You don't know where you are.

And … and who's that boy?

---

It was the pulse that gave her away. It was getting stronger, and you're no doctor, but you knew what was coming. Almost as soon as you'd ran back in, you'd ran back out again and got a doctor to see her. She was waking up, you were sure of it.

But now she is, she seems dazed. You can't take your eyes off her, but she's looking at you, confused, with some sort of disgust in her eyes, a film that clouds her. You open your mouth to speak, but then the doctor is ushering you out.

"But I have to – Wait! Sonny!?" you cry as he pushes you out, gently but with a harsh purpose in it. You stare at her through the glass until he draws the curtain down and you slump against the wall.

She was looking at you like .. like she didn't even know who you were.


End file.
